purple motes

This coming week in the U.S. is Public Service Recognition Week. Everyone should celebrate this important week. To help you, the Public Employees Roundtable at the Council for Excellence in Government has created a 24-page "How to Celebrate Handbook."

From the "Did You Know?" section of the Handbook:

• The National Institutes of Health began in a single attic room with one doctor searching for a way to prevent the spread of cholera.
• Two employees of the National Bureau of Standards invented the neon light.
• The first person to set foot on the moon, Neil Armstrong, was a public employee.
• Government scientists, tired of ironing clothes, developed technology to make cotton fabrics as wrinkle resistant as permanent press fabrics. Credit is due researchers working at the Agricultural Research Service.
• Alexander Graham Bell, father of the telephone, worked as an agent of the Census Bureau.

A fine example of dedication to public service is Smokey Bear. Often incorrectly called "Smokey the Bear," Smokey Bear is a character in a long-running public service campaign to prevent forest fires. According to Wikipedia, "Smokey's forest fire prevention campaign has reduced the area lost annually from 22 million to 4 million acres (89,000 to 16,000 km²)."

Government agencies and laws have played an important role in supporting Smokey Bear's efforts:

The fictional character Smokey Bear is administered by three entities: the United States Forest Service, the National Association of State Foresters, and the Ad Council. Smokey Bear's name and image are protected by U.S. federal law, the Smokey Bear Act of 1952 (16 U.S.C. 580 (p-2); 18 U.S.C. 711), which provides for actual imprisonment for those who manufacture goods depicting Smokey Bear without having secured a license from the government. [Wikipedia]

If these licenses are auctioned, they provide important precedent for the auction of spectrum licenses in various countries around the world.

Tags: bears, public service

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In an article entitled "C'mon and Be a Bureaucrat," a U.S. national weekly magazine discussed the importance of recruiting new U.S. government bureaucrats. The article noted:

When an interest group wants to torpedo a government initiative, it simply invokes the "bureaucrat" as an emblem of ineptitude. "We saw a slight change during the 'West Wing' era," says Pat McGinnis, president of the Washington-based nonprofit Council for Excellence in Government. "But otherwise it's just been nonstop portrayals of the bungling bureaucrat. It takes a toll."

Bureaucrats need to develop a thick skin and the ability to focus on doing their jobs. They also need to develop confidence in their own importance. Max Stier, president of the nonprofit Partnership for Public Service, observed:

"It's not about what you can do for government. We need to convey what government can do for you."

The Carnival of the Bureaucrats aspires to convey what bureaucrats can do for you, not just in government, but also in the many different organizations in which they work.

Occasionally critics acknowledge their mistakes. Steve Thurston at The Buckingham Herald Tribblog called a woodpecker stupid for banging his head on a metal electrical tower. But as Louis Quay explained, the woodpecker was not attempting to peck wood, but was making noise to mark territory. Pecking on a metal pole does that effectively. Readers should think about this example next time they feel inclined to use the phrase "stupid bureaucrat." Thurston appropriately acknowledged his mistake.

Last month the Carnival of the Bureaucrats discussed sacrificing people for the organization and cited the superb example of Duke's actions in the Lacrosse Rape Hoax. Subsequently, the law firm representing the plaintiff in the civil suit against Duke filed an amended complaint. One point of many from the amended complaint directly addressed this issue:

454. In response to a plea for Duke to show some measure of support for the students who were being framed in plain view of the University’s leadership, the Chairman explained, “sometimes individuals have to be sacrificed for the good of the Organization.”

Bureaucrats regularly sacrifice themselves for the good of the organization. Note, however, that such sacrifice does not include being sent to prison for decades on false charges.

M. B. Herrera discusses leadership. He states:

Albeit leaders are oriented to their work (and not to their self-exaltation), they are a symbol of the group, which may easily mean that they are a symbol of your company.

We believe that this statement applies generally to bureaucrats.

David at DirtFromTexas submitted a post entitled, "Texas Gestapo To Perform DNA Test on FLDS Kids." He remarked in his submission, "Why is the State on Texas hell bent on ripping this kids from their Parents all the while violating their Constitutional rights?" Answering that questions is not our responsibility at the Carnival of the Bureaucrats. David should contact the Texas state government office in charge of providing reasons.

Edith Yeung documents and compares the Obama and Clinton campaigns' Web 2.0 functionality. How these metrics relate to the candidates' bureaucratic credentials are not clear. As innovative technology, Web 2.0 is a bureaucratic negative. But as a symbol used mainly for discussion and creating documents, Web 2.0 is a bureaucratic positive. Perhaps the Obama and Clinton campaigns could form a joint committee to explore standard metrics for evaluating the bureaucratic merits of Web 2.0.

That's all for this month's Carnival of the Bureaucrats. Submit your blog article to the next edition using our carnival submission form. Submissions should conform to the Carnival's regulations. Past editions of the Carnival of the Bureaucrats can be found on the Carnival's category page.

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Tags: bureaucracy, energy, flowers, sun

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This month at the Carnival of the Bureaucrats we review founding documents of bureaucracy. Perhaps the most important historical moment in bureaucracy was the drafting of a document whose first paragraph includes this exalted statement: "When in the course of bureaucratic events it becomes necessary for an organization to sacrifice some of its members, a decent respect for the opinions of those in charge of reviewing operational procedures requires that the bureaucrats whose job assignment includes making the relevant decisions should declare the causes which impel them to throw members of their organization under a bus."

Bureaucrats today celebrate this important documentary principle. Consider the Duke lacrosse rape hoax. In circumstances of gross procedural injustices and an astonishing lack of credible evidence of rape, Duke Chairman of the Board Richard Steel reportedly explained that it would "best for Duke" if Duke students were forced to endure a rape trial.

At least some of the facts of Duke's actions have been submitted to the candid world. To me, these actions indicate contempt for legal due process, wanton disregard for truth, extreme prejudice, and major injuries to Duke students. I thus believe that Duke's bureaucratic leaders should draft a document detailing why the harms to these Duke students were "best for Duke."

The important work of drafting and editing documents takes time. Fortunately, educational administrators comprised 51.4% of persons with full-time professional positions in higher education in 2006 (survey results). Thus, among persons holding full-time professional positions in higher education, administrators have finally surpassed faculty members. The future looks bright for bureaucratic education. In this increasingly competitive environment, Duke should work hard to build upon the Duke community's past successes and to insure a high institutional ranking in the future.

Medical study of a French civil servant with a tiny brain has produced an important scientific insight:

"What I find amazing to this day is how the brain can deal with something which you think should not be compatible with life," commented Dr. Max Muenke, a pediatric brain defect specialist at the National Human Genome Research Institute.

While persons with tiny brains are quite common, bureaucratic functioning is truly remarkable.

All bureaucrats experience a few days of discouragement at some time before they receive their 25-year service pin. Geek poetry can help address this temporary condition. For mournful reading I recommend Epitaph for DOS Gamer.

Cooper at Intelligent Essays describes FBI Intelligence Reform. He notes:

The main objectives undertaken by the FBI include intelligence structural reorganization, a communication and computer network overhaul, and management retraining.

Gathering management for several weeks of offsite retraining often sharply increases staff productivity.

In a related post, Louise Manning at The Human Imprint discusses management commitment. Management commitment includes:

The development of a management infrastructure to implement the actions necessary to achieve organisational goals and objectives and to deliver products and associated services that consistently meet customer requirements

More managers need to be committed.

Roger Shuy at Language Log defends bureaucrats. He declares, "Most of them [bureaucrats] were really nice folks, just like the rest of us." We have no doubts about the first clause of that sentence.

Tim Bray at ongoing offers thoughts on business. He observes:

The free market is a wonderful thing in the abstract and in its way a triumph of human creativity. But it is a profoundly unnatural creation and would self-destruct by this time next year without those oh-so-despised public servants standing there with the guns.

Government regulators do not "intervene" in the economy. Government regulators are a vital part of the economy. Show some appreciation for government regulators today!

That's all for this month's Carnival of the Bureaucrats. Submit your blog article to the next edition using our carnival submission form. Submissions should conform to the Carnival's regulations. Past editions of the Carnival of the Bureaucrats can be found on the Carnival's category page.

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Bureaucrats are renowned for their dedication and tireless, unheralded devotion. No twentieth-century bureaucratic better exemplifies such devotion than James Hampton. He was a low-level staffer with the U.S. General Services Administration from 1946 to 1964. Working evenings and weekends from 1950 to his death in 1964, he created what one art historian has called "America's greatest work of visionary art."

Hampton had none of the advantages of an elite New York artist. He was an African-American experiencing de facto segregation and inhumane discrimination. He was a single man living in a small apartment on a meager bureaucratic salary. He had no social connections with influential art critics, he didn't attend exclusive happenings with museum curators and gallery owners, and he lacked the education necessary to cite leading artists such as Duchamp, Tatlin, Velázquez, Galbi, and Schmahmann. Hampton had only his devotion, his genius, and his bureaucratic skills.

Hampton made the best of his circumstances. In an article written for the exhibition of Hampton's work at the Museum of Fine Arts in Boston, one of the museum's curators noted:

An ingenious selection and use of materials and an innate feeling for design characterize Hampton's radiant work. A poor man, he applied his imagination to the transformation of discarded materials. Merchants in the used-furniture district near the garage remember that Hampton would browse, inquire about prices, and sometimes return with a child's wagon to carry away his purchases. All of the objects are covered with different grades of gold and aluminum foils removed from store displays, bottles, cigarette boxes, and rolls of kitchen foil. Hampton paid neighborhood indigents for the foil on their wine bottles, and he walked the streets with a croker sack in which to carry his finds. He also gathered used light bulbs, cardboard, insulation board, construction paper, desk blotters, and sheets of transparent plastic, probably from the trash of the government buildings where he worked.

Hampton, clearly drawing upon bureaucratic language and concepts, entitled his work The Throne of the Third Heaven of the Nations' Millennium General Assembly. Inscribed within this work was the sententious statement, "Where there is no vision the People Perish." No one who ponders Hampton's work can believe the pernicious myth that bureaucrats are prophetless and lack vision.

[video included above]

Submissions to this month's Carnival of Bureaucrats show the rich tapestry of bureaucratically relevant human activity on the web. We are pleased that this carnival continues to grow larger.

B.Y. Clark at Bureaucratic Student: A Public Administration Blog provides lists of prime-time bureaucrats, meaning TV shows that star bureaucrats. Cops and District Attorneys have thirty-four shows listed, teachers twelve shows, and court officials six shows. Elected officials have six shows, but as we've repeatedly re-iterated again and again, politicians are not bureaucrats. Sadly, prime-time shows include only one show presenting the office life of bureaucrats. As Mr. Clark notes, being an office worker is the life of most bureaucrats. Perhaps bureaucrats want some time away from the office when they watch TV.

Alan D. Mutter at Reflections of a Newsosaur pondered how many persons "should edit an article before it goes in [sic] the newspaper." Among more than 400 respondents, 22% favored three or more editors, while 55% favored two editors. Editing is important bureaucratic work. We are pleased that many of Mr. Mutter's readers support bureaucracy.

Raymond at the Money Blue Book asks, "Would You Give Up Your Right To Vote For A Million Dollars?" He notes that to do so would be quite reasonable. Persons' willingness to make significant sacrifices to vote is remarkable.

Rob Moshe at Rob Moshe Purpose Realized seeks persons to sign up to help him help others. He explains:

My goal in the next year is to help at least 500 people get closer to their goals and dreams. I will do that through the sharing of ideas, insights, information and connections.

We think Mr. Moshe should aim higher. If he got a job with the U.S. Federal Government, he would be part of bureaucracy that helps 300 million persons get closer to their goals and dreams.

Mark Riffey's Business is Personal discusses U.S. presidential candidates use of mobile text and voice broadcasting capabilities. As we've repeatedly re-iterated again and again, politicians are not bureaucrats. See above.

Freddie Sirmans considers "Can The US Prevent a Starvation Crises?" That's also the title of his blog, and its only post. Mr. Sirmans observes:

Government itself is not part of a functional economy. It is a necessary parasite that is needed to protect the economy and society. Government is not a threat to an economy as long as it takes its cut off the top and fulfills its role as a protector.

We hope that future posts will more emphatically emphasize that the government is here to protect and serve, which is an important and necessary function, as is that of beneficial intestinal bacteria, such those included new products such as DanActive, a probiotic dairy drink that helps strengthen your body's defenses.

Anna Farmery at the Engaging Brand Blog advocates curiosity and imagination. She recounts:

I took my cat to the vet last night, and as always I love to learn, so was asking the vet about the treatment. To my shock he turned round and said "Stop being curious, you don't need to know that is my job!"

Here at the Carnival of Bureaucrats, we take job descriptions seriously. We do not believe that one person should do another person's job. Ms. Farmery should have told her vet that she would be pleased to receive a lengthy written report, with an appended options memo, examining in detail her cat's issues. Any self-respecting bureaucrat would be delighted to receive and execute such a request.

Warren Wong at Personal Development made three separate submissions to this month's Carnival of Bureaucrats. Among Mr. Wong's submissions, our favorite is his submission advocating commitment. We believe that all bureaucrats should be committed. Sooner or later, most bureaucrats probably will be.

John Crenshaw at Truthful Lending describes The Biggest Scam Your Bank Gets Away With Everyday. Notice that this scam depends on administrative details. So don't think that administrative details aren't important.

Lorcan Dempsey brain-storms about how to identify documentary gaps. He draws inspiration from Helen Vendler, who wrote:

And since there is no better motive for writing on a subject than a gap on library shelves, I began in earnest, some years ago, to study Yeats's lyric style.

This is truly inspiring. Bureaucrats recognize no higher calling than producing a continuous stream of documents.

Wilson Ng at Reflections of a BizDrivenLife discusses working for a boss within the bureaucratic hierarchy. He observes:

First you plan together, and then you hire/organize according to these objectives, then you manage or direct, and then the control part comes in monitoring the progress and redefining issues and priorities. and then go back to planning again.

That's a good description of bureaucratic work experience.

At noted above, Mr. Wong made three separate submissions to this month's Carnival of the Bureaucrats. The carnival's regulations clearly do not specify a limit on the number of submissions. To address this regulatory oversight, we hereby initiate a Notice of Proposed Notice of Inquiry (NPNI) asking whether we should seek comments on whether to consider establishing regulations limiting the number of submissions per month. Comments on this NPNI will be accepted for the next six months.

That's all for this month's Carnival of the Bureaucrats. Submit your blog article to the next edition using our carnival submission form. Submissions should conform to the Carnival's regulations. Past editions of the Carnival of the Bureaucrats can be found on the Carnival's category page.

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Being able to maintain a good sitting position is a core competency for bureaucrats. In the video below, a bureaucrat working in the Alberta Human Rights and Citizenship Commission demonstrates the challenges that a conscientious bureaucrat faces. Watch it carefully and learn!

The bureaucrat begins with a lean-forward, braced note-taking position. The problem with such a strong documentary start is that it can be difficult to sustain. Thus we were not surprised to see her soon shift into the double-elbow, flat-arm bracing position. That's an excellent position to go the distance in a long-winded meeting. Moreover, it helps protect the head in the case of a somnolence-induced sagging of the upper spinal region.

Notice, however, that the bureaucrat failed to hold the position. Despite some standard head movements, which signal attention and help to promote blood flow, at 5:10 into the video she broke form into the back-leaning, folded-armed position. This position is associated with arrogance and obstinacy. It has no place in the sitting repertoire of a professional bureaucrat.

Supplementary tentative statement: According to the Alberta Human Rights and Citizenship Commission, it is against the law in Alberta "to discriminate against anyone in the following areas of activity... [including] public statements, publications, notices, signs, symbols, emblems, or other representations." We therefore and heretofore hereby duly declare that the above public statement is not meant to discriminate against, between, or for anyone in Alberta, and that we hereby affirm, in accordance with the applicable human rights law, that it applies not just to the bureaucrat represented, but equally to all bureaucrats in Alberta.

In other bureaucratic emissions for this month, Tim O'Reilly at O'Reilly Radar discusses Bad Math Among eBook Enthusiasts. O'Reilly is an organization that has been in business since 1978. Hence it qualifies as a bona-fide bureaucracy for the purposes of this Carnival in accordance with Carnival Rule 2.A.a, calculated according to Internet time. Tim declares:

My advice to publishers and authors is this: figure out what it costs to produce what you sell, estimate what kind of volume you'll be able to achieve using the best available data, and then set your prices at a level that will deliver a reasonable profit from your efforts.

This is classic public-utility pricing methodology. Forget about Web 2.0 buzzwords; on the web or off, just set prices for rate-payers. True bureaucratic insight.

Chris Tolles at Topix offers data on comments. The data show that non-registered users generate three times as many comments with only a 50% higher comment rejection rate. Is requiring registration a bad idea? Of course not. Requiring registration helps users to develop their skills in filling out forms.

The Daily Davos reports that billionaire George Soros has called for a "massive injection of regulation and oversight over financial markets." In conjunction with such an effort, we believe it is also important to increase public appreciation for regulators. How about establishing a "Hug a Regulator" Day? If you know a regulator, thank her/him for all s/he does!

Steve Yelverton discusses journalism history. He states, "Today's J-student should understand that the task is not to get a job and draw a paycheck, but rather to build a following." Followers are necessary for a following. Work in bureaucracy is excellent training for developing followers.

Samuel Bryson at Total Wellbeing discusses free market economy and the welfare state. He states, "It may well be that a lot of the money disappears in various bureaucratic processes, which is a common complaint of the classical liberals." It may well be that this common complaint has little merit and should be summarily dismissed.

The Little Professor describes the Academic Olympics. It includes the "bureaucratic triple jump":

Each competitor must fight back against a student grievance, which s/he contests in three different administrative offices. There are bonus points for eloquence, documentation, and concision, but penalties for foul language, threats, and/or tears.

We are delighted that bureaucracy has risen to the level of Olympic sport.

That's all for this month's Carnival of the Bureaucrats. Submit your blog article to the next edition using our Carnival submission form. Submissions should conform to the Carnival regulations. Past posts and future hosts can be found on the Carnival index page.

Tags: assets, bureaucracy, posture, sitting, skills

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In our continual efforts to increase appreciation for bureaucratic arts, we visited the Renwick Gallery of the Smithsonian American Art Museum. The art was generally well-labeled and neatly organized. The most important work in the Gallery was a wood cabinet entitled Bureau of Bureaucracy. The Bureau of Bureaucracy was large and intricately crafted, and included various hardwoods, a hierarchy of polished brass, and some gold-leafed sections. If you spent enough time with it, you could also recognize some mother-of-pearl.

We applaud the enormous amount of time that artist Kim Schmahmann obviously spent producing this work. But his work would have benefited from more time spent actually working in a bureaucracy, rather than merely working with bureaucracies. In short, his art is totally unrealistic. While Schmahmann clearly appreciates the importance of processing documents, his work lacks visible piles of documents. His artist's statement and work description indicates that one can interact in detail and in depth with the Bureau of Bureaucracy. But in actual Gallery operation, the Bureau is labeled "Please do not touch."

Another part of the label for the Bureau of Bureaucracy states:

A model of the main reading room in the Library of Congress represents the benevolent power of collected papers. On the adjacent panel, a collection of books invites us to reflect on the dangers of bureaucracy run amok: the titles Power and Rationality sit firmly on the shelf, while Humanity teeters on the brink.

If humanity is teetering on the brink, there's a need for government intervention. Government bureaucrats are here and ready to help.

As usual, the Carnival of the Bureaucrats received an array of submissions that did not conform to the carnival regulations. These included posts about presidential candidates (politicians are NOT bureaucrats), a "naughty little liberal" declaring his love for "conservative dominatrix" Ann Coulter (this is the Carnival of the Bureaucrats, NOT Facebook), and various posts about how to make or save money (while bureaucrats are generally underpaid, financial advice does NOT satisfy this Carnival's regulations). These posts have accordingly been tentatively rejected. Parties may file for reconsideration.

Among other submissions, Anna Farmery at the Engaging Brand Blog reports about a bureaucratic leader and declares, "Here is a leader with a strong track record.....and yet he found inspiration in a library." That's not at all surprising. Bureaucrats find collections of documents inspiring.

Leah Price posts at the NY Times Book Review about changing attitudes toward reading over the centuries. She writes:

The file, the list, the label, the memo; these are the genres that will keep reading alive. Whatever happens to the novel, we'll always need a rule book.

Absolutely true. We are pleased that bright young scholars are moving into the field of bureaucracy and administration. A grad student should think about the trend toward administration when thinking about her or his scholarly career.

The Ode Street Tribune reports that the officials had an excellent Bookjammin' Basketball Tournament. Without regulation, there is no game.

John in Carolina discusses responses to a recent journalism professor's proposal for the news industry to regulate online journalism. Most journalists work in organizations that have been outstanding bureaucracies for a half-century or longer. We have complete confidence in journalism school deans' abilities to arrange meetings. Nonetheless, we fear that traditional news organizations and supporting bureaucracies do not have sufficient staff to regulate bloggers around the world. We look forward to future reports addressing staff planning.

That's all for this month's Carnival of the Bureaucrats. Submit your blog article to the next edition using our carnival submission form. Submissions should conform to the Carnival regulations. Past posts and future hosts can be found on the Carnival index page.

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This month at the Carnival of the Bureaucrats we honor a true bureaucratic hero, Stanislav Yevgrafovich Petrov. The comically rational blog Overcoming Bias described well what Mr. Petrov did:

On September 26th, 1983, Lieutenant Colonel Stanislav Yevgrafovich Petrov was the officer on duty when the warning system reported a US missile launch. Petrov kept calm, suspecting a computer error.

Then the system reported another US missile launch.

And another, and another, and another.

What had actually happened, investigators later determined, was sunlight on high-altitude clouds aligning with the satellite view on a US missile base.

In the command post there were beeping signals, flashing lights, and officers screaming at people to remain calm. According to several accounts I've read, there was a large flashing screen from the automated computer system saying simply "START" (presumably in Russian). Afterward, when investigators asked Petrov why he hadn't written everything down in the logbook, Petrov replied,"Because I had a phone in one hand and the intercom in the other, and I don't have a third hand."

The policy of the Soviet Union called for launch on warning. The Soviet Union's land radar could not detect missiles over the horizon, and waiting for positive identification would limit the response time to minutes. Petrov's report would be relayed to his military superiors, who would decide whether to start a nuclear war.

Petrov decided that, all else being equal, he would prefer not to destroy the world. He sent messages declaring the launch detection a false alarm, based solely on his personal belief that the US did not seem likely to start an attack using only five missiles.

In words that epitomize bureaucratic greatness, Petrov later stated:

I was simply doing my job, and I was the right person at the right time, that's all. My late wife for 10 years knew nothing about it. 'So what did you do?' she asked me. I did nothing.

Stanislav Yevgrafovich Petrov was not a political leader. He was not a general. He was a low-level military administrative functionary. In short, he was an ordinary bureaucrat. Every person who lives on planet earth should be grateful to this bureaucrat. He saved the world from nuclear war.

Unquestionably the strongest bureaucracies in the world of those of military departments such as those of the Soviet Union and the United States. Military bureaucracies date to the beginning of modern nations and are likely to sustain themselves cooperatively forever. Military bureaucracies typically have an exquisitely articulated command hierarchy, large collections of acronyms, and enormously powerful capabilities to produce and revise documents. Military bureaucracies, like most bureaucracies, perform functions that persons outside the organization seldom appreciate except in extraordinary circumstances.

In all ranks of bureaucracies, from the largest and most powerful to the smallest and most fleeting, the world needs a huge number of bureaucrats like Petrov. All bureaucrats should honor and emulate Petrov. A person who meets a bureaucrat should meet a Petrov.

Dr. Helen has attempted to educate officialdom at the Tennessee Department of Health. A commenter assessed the chances that the Department of Health will recognize actual facts:

They'll probably ask Slim Pickens and former Senator Sam Nunn to advise them. And those are the chances, Slim and Nunn.

Read Dr. Helen's post and then check out the "Scope of the Problem" on page 6 of this "educational material" on the Tennessee Department of Health website. An army of Petrov's is needed to stop this anti-male bigotry from causing major human harm.

Anna Farmery at the Engaging Brand Blog offers "A thought on life....and branding." She observes, "There is no perfection in humans...." The obvious implication of this submission to the Carnival of Bureaucrats is that perfection can be found only in bureaucracy. We fully agree.

Charles H. Green at Trust Matters discusses terrorists and convenience stores. He insightfully analyzes why everyone is treated like a terrorist. But he suggests, "the biggest reason of all may be a tendency to rely on systems rather than people." We disagree. A good bureaucratic system would treat everyone as a number, not as a terrorist. If you had a good number, you wouldn't be treated like a terrorist.

The Topiary Cow discusses how to excel in interior decorating. She applauds piles of paperwork and observes, "When Topiary walks into a home, if there are no books, no writing, no computers, no projects, nothing to indicate any mental activity, she has a sinking feeling." Topiary appreciates a bureaucratic environment. So should everyone.

Phil for Humanity discusses the dangers of scheduling with your boss. He observes, "I’ve discovered that the best schedule is not the best case scenario, but rather a realistic guess how long the task should take with an extra padding of time to work out any issues that may arise." But a better way to address scheduling questions is to set up a meeting to discuss them.

Blake Williams at "What I hear you saying..." discusses branding the river of conversation. He recalls a small local news site reporting, "Every time a contentious local issue was covered on the site, the station received nasty-grams and phone calls from half the town to remove the comments they were hosting." Perhaps this site could get a job consulting to Mashables about how to improve its Troll Week.

That concludes this month's Carnival of the Bureaucrats. Submit your blog article to the next edition using our Carnival submission form. Submissions should conform to the Carnival regulations. Past posts and future hosts can be found on the Carnival index page.

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Peter S. Magnusson recently noted that, worldwide, "for the first time in 10,000 years, farming is not the dominating industry." More specifically, the International Labour Organization's Key Indicators of the Labour Market (KILM) shows that worldwide in 2006, employment in services has exceeded employment in agriculture. Employment in services, agriculture, and industry now account for 42%, 36%, and 22% of the worldwide workforce, respectively.

Magnusson's observation can be further refined. Bureaucracy is a central feature of the services sector. A keyword search for "bureaucracy" on the Social Science Research Network (SSRN) returns 274 documents, compared to 247 returned for a search for "farming." Moreover, a study indicates that scholarly documents addressing bureaucracy are 23% longer, on average, than are scholarly documents addressing farming. Hence, on a total page count basis, bureaucracy is now considerably more important than farming.

We are pleased to announce that the Chair of this carnival is none other than Max Weber himself, that pioneering scholar of bureaucracy. Weber understood that bureaucracy is not just a feature of public administration; bureaucracy is a general outcome of social evolution toward rational-legal social structures and physically inert workers. We are grateful for Weber's continuing management and oversight of this enterprise.

Philippe De Ridder at Open Innovators offers a carnival addressing "How Government 2.0 tools can increase collaboration, usability and effectiveness in government services." The extensive comments on these tools that we have prepared have been passed up this Carnival's management hierarchy. As soon as we receive Mr. Weber's edits and subsequent approval of the revised comments, we will include them here.

Riversider at the Save the Ribble observes the benefits of sandbagging the Preston Council Leaders. Sandbags might help those politicians appreciate the risks of flooding. Bureaucrats, however, commonly handle deluges of documents and hence are well aware of such dangers.

Hugh MacLeod at Gaping Void provides "Some Thoughts on Microsoft." He discusses the importance of the staff who help to solidify an organization, "to maintain and enhance the apparatus of bureaucracy." An organization without a solid structure could easily collapse into a heap of sand with just a few twigs sticking out. Support your organization's bureaucracy!

Phil for Humanity asks "Please Help Solve America's Economic Issues." He remarks, "Fellow Americans, the economic future of the United States of America looks bleak, so please contact your representatives in government and demand fiscal responsibility immediately!" How this submission to the Carnival of the Bureaucrats relates to bureaucrats is not clear. We tentatively conclude that "contact" means "send a document" (electronic or paper). Bureaucrats will process such documents appropriately.

Leon Gettler at Sox First reports that the Iraqi government accounting system is mismanaged. It seems that the system was designed and built without sufficient respect for Iraqi bureaucrats. Not respecting bureaucrats is always a mistake.

Fear and Loathing - The Gonzo Papers, offers a post entitled "The President of The United States Is A Liar." He remarks, "The President of The United States, I think, is the ultimate bureaucrat. If you want someone "at a lower level" please let me know, eh. Thanks." We disagree. The President of the United States is a politician, not a bureaucrat. A bureaucrat is very different from a politician. We note, moreover, that all submissions concerning bureaucrats must adhere to the Carnival of the Bureaucrat's regulations, including Rule 6. We do not, however, reach the issue of whether this submission adheres to that rule.

That concludes this month's Carnival of the Bureaucrats. Submit your blog article to the next edition using our Carnival submission form. Submissions should conform to the Carnival regulations. Past posts and future hosts can be found on the Carnival index page.

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Naturing leaders is important for any bureaucracy. This month the Carnival of the Bureaucrats encourages government bureaucrats to join Young Government Leaders:

YGL is a professional organization of young men and women employed by the Federal Government. Our mission is to educate, inspire, and transform the current and future leaders of the Federal Government. ... Our organization is committed to serving as a coordinated voice for the current and future generations of young government leaders by providing a community of leadership through professional development activities, networking opportunities, social events and seminars.

YGL's About Us page adds:

This organization will advocate for the unique needs of young government employees and provide value, structure, resources, and a voice to the next generation of Federal Government employees.

Here at the Carnival of the Bureaucrats, we have been providing a voice to all bureaucrats. As numerous studies submitted to federal government agencies indicate, Federal Government employees are especially important bureaucrats. We are proud to support the Young Government Leaders in that organization's ongoing efforts to further our common mission of advancing and deepening our efforts to highlight the importance of skilled and talented bureaucrats taking the initiative to create next-generation networks and bureaucracies for twenty-first century communication needs.

The form for joining YGL is available online. The FAQ page describes qualifications required for membership:

Young Government Leaders (YGL) does not have a specific age limit to be eligible for the group. YGL identifies potential members as those that identify themselves as "young government leaders." Generally, our members range from 22-40, but we accept members of all ages.

Thinking of oneself as a young leader can be self-affirming and empowering. Everyone should take that first step to joining Young Government Leaders!

Among other entries this month, Goddess discusses workplace burnout. She remarks, "What's really the cause of workplace burnout? Here's how to tell if you are symptomatic and how to do something about it!" Burnout could happen to young government leaders. Don't let it happen to you!

TinkerX discusses writing, which is a bureaucratic function second in importance only to attending meetings. The author produces hand-crafted love sonnets, wedding toasts, previous life bios for cats, long, harsh insults, as well as short insults. At least some bureaucrats would like to deploy on occasion a long, harsh insult, but professional bureaucratic decorum prohibits said deployment.

Eric Michael Johnson at The Primate Diaries explains The Downstream Effects of Biopiracy. The header for this blog depicts a primate typing on an old-fashioned typewriter. Given the history of insulting bureaucrats as hidebound buffoons (which I believe are related to baboons), I initially decided to reject this submission as violating the spirit of Rule 6 of the Carnival of the Bureaucrats' regulations. However, on reconsideration, the image at issue appears to refer to the creator of the blog. It does not appear to be intended as an insult to bureaucrats. Thus this submission has been tentatively accepted into this month's Carnival.

Matt Waite at mattwaite.com discusses the development of project ideas. He declares, "A demo gets a lot farther than a memo." This silly idea probably comes from Mr. Waite's youthfulness. With more experience in a traditional media bureaucracy, Mr. Waite is sure to learn that only editing memos advances one's career further than writing them.

That concludes this month's Carnival of the Bureaucrats. Submit your blog article to the next edition using our Carnival submission form. Submissions should conform to the Carnival regulations. Past posts and future hosts can be found on the Carnival index page.

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